Wake Forest University has frequently been ranked at the bottom of the top, so to speak, but now their era of almost-excellence has come to an end. This past week, US News released a new set of rankings, placing Wake Forest out of the top 25 schools. Who's taking their spot? None other than Monsters University.
"Usually we wait until late August, or September to release our rankings," stated US News writer, Lisa McNeil, "but after finding out about Monsters U, we knew we had to act fast."
Apparently, for a staff members birthday party, McNeil and many other US News reporters went to see the new Pixar film. They came for laughs, but they left impressed.
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| US News Staff watching Monsters U |
"It's truly an exceptional institution of learning," said McNeil. "Sure, it's not perfect, but it definitely deserves to be in the top 25."
Naturally, Wake Forest students, alumni, and faculty were none too happy about this decision. Student tour guide, Danny Cunningham, was particularly upset.
"What am I supposed to say on my tours now? 'Wake Forest is proud to be a top 26 school?' We pay 50 thousand dollars a semester and we can't even beat out an animated university?"
When questioned about what gave Monsters U the leg up over Wake, McNeil offered some insight. First off, she referenced the diversity factor:
"Wake Forest is 80% Caucasian. At MU, they don't even have white people. Heck, they don't even have people! Their student body has almost every kind of monster in the world: one-eyed or two-headed, fluffy or scaley. Any monster would feel like they had a community here."
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| Just a sampling of the diverse MU student body |
Secondly, McNeil compared the social lives of the two campuses. Though less total fraternities and sororities, MU's campus features a Greek Row. "This allows for more on-campus functions," explained McNeil, "which is always safer. At Wake Forest, they only offer the fraternities and sororities 'lounges.' These lounges are basically the basements of dorm buildings which include tile floor, low ceilings, and one, maybe two, bathroom stalls."
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| A MU fraternity house |
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| A WFU fraternity lounge |
Finally, McNeil discussed Monster University's top notch Scare Program. After pointing out that it was the absolute best in the country, she then highlighted the fact that in comparison WFU's Business school is found at the not-so-impressive #47 slot. "You can't argue with numbers like that," said McNeil.
Dr. Nathan O'Hatch, President of Wake Forest, was eventually reached for comment. When asked about the new rankings he said, "I don't know what you're talking about! My school is number 17!" After minutes of discussion, he realized we were not talking about Notre Dame and neglected to say anything further.
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| A few MU/WFU demographics compared |
All above information was found from their respective websites: http://www.wfu.edu/ and http://monstersuniversity.com/edu/index.html.
(disclaimer: I could not love WFU more-- this was all in fun, and as you probably know, Monsters U is not a real school...also Wake is technically ranked #27 in the US News rankings, with two schools tied at 1, and two other schools tied at 24)
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